Cracking the code:

Understanding men’s dress codes.

In a world of almost anything goes fashion, your guests might like some guidance on what to wear to your wedding. Sure, you might say, “wear whatever you feel comfortable in”, but many of your guests will feel most comfortable if they know they are in step with your hopes and expectations for your Big Day. That means you may want to pick a dress code and let everyone know, either formally on your invitations, or informally as they inquire.

Using an actual recognised dress code is more helpful than “a touch of glamour”, “casual elegant” or “dress to impress”. But what do all the traditional dress codes even mean? With A-listers and influencers screaming “look-at-me” through their increasingly unconventional choices for each of the dress codes, it’s hard to know what’s actually meant by each one. Interpretation of the codes has evolved over time and these days the boundaries between each code are blurred, and have different names in different countries, but they all began with a pretty clear definition.

Below is an outline for the traditional expectations of each of the major dress codes, mainly as they relate to men, who it turns out, are often most in need of guidance on the subject.

White Tie

Originating in the 1800s and reaching its peak before World War 1, the most formal code of all is White-Tie. It’s less common today as a wedding dress code, mainly because almost no one owns the appropriate clothes and this then requires a financial outlay by guests to buy or rent their attire. Just to be clear, there’s no such thing as “White Tie Casual”, so for this one, you’re either all in or all out.

For men, that means black tailored pants, with a matching black tailcoat. Your shirt will be white, ideally with wing tip collars, French cuffs and onyx shirt studs. Your waistcoat will be white, as will your bow tie. Your trousers will be without belt loops and held up by white braces if required. Shoes should be black patent leather, but today highly polished black leather will suffice. Men may choose to wear white gloves, although they are not required.

For women, it’s time to roll out a full-length gown in an elegant cut and fabric. Avoid shorter “cocktail” dresses. If you have formal jewellery, now is the time to let it shine. If they have one, married women can even wear a tiara to a White-Tie event!

Black Tie

Around WW1 the monied classes on both sides of the Atlantic were looking for something a bit more casual for dining than White-Tie and those uncomfortable tails. This desire morphed into the “dinner jacket” or “tuxedo” and what we now understand as Black-Tie. If you’re interested, the word tuxedo originated in the USA, named after Tuxedo Park, a rural resort for New York’s social elite where the jacket was popularised. The English still use the term dinner jacket, recognising its place as a formal jacket worn to dinner, in place of tails. In Australia, both names are acceptable.

Bearing in mind the origins of the dinner jacket, Black-Tie is reserved for evening occasions. If you are having a morning ceremony followed by a luncheon reception, you wouldn’t choose Black-Tie. Today, there are a few choices available within the Black-Tie code, but you still have to stay inside the lanes to meet the brief.

For men, that means a tuxedo. Your jacket may have either satin peak lapels or a satin shawl collar. Peak lapels are more formal and closer to the original tailcoat. A shawl collar is perfectly acceptable, although more casual. Tuxedos with notch lapels are widely available today from fashion brands, but strictly speaking, notch lapels belong on business suits, not dinner suits. Jackets are ideally black, although midnight navy is acceptable. Oddly, under some lights, the navy looks more “black” than the black. An ivory jacket is also acceptable in warmer climates.

Your trousers should match your jacket, unless you are wearing ivory, in which case black trousers are the right choice. Trousers should have a satin stripe or cord down the side of each leg and your buttons should be silk covered rather than horn (or plastic). Trousers should not have belt loops or be worn with a belt. Some trousers will have side-adjusters but if you need help keeping them up, a simple pair of white braces is the traditional choice. Braces that attach via buttons inside the trouser waistband is a level above clip-on braces.

Your shirt will be white, with a traditional fold over collar. It may have pleats on the front or be a “Marcella” bib fronted shirt. The latter is more formal. Your shirt will have no visible attached white buttons. It will either have a placket hiding the buttons if they are attached, or you will use onyx detachable shirt studs on the upper button holes. French cuffs and formal cufflinks are part of the deal.

The tradition is to hide your waist, which is done either by wearing a cummerbund in a black satin (and with the pleats facing upwards) or a waistcoat. If you opt for a waistcoat, it should match your jacket and traditionally has a lower, scoop-fronted profile.

Shoes are traditionally a patent black leather loafer or derby. Velvet slippers was originally a thing too, Patent leather loafers may be embellished with velvet ribbons. Avoid brogues, boots, moccasins, or anything casual, even if they are black. Today, you can get away with a pair of highly polished black Oxford lace-up shoes.

Accessories should match the outfit, so if you wear a watch, make it a discrete formal watch, perhaps with a black leather strap.

For women, Black-Tie suggests a formal gown, and not the “little black dress”. Traditionally women would be expected to wear a full length “evening” gown in a conservative cut and fabric.

Creative Black Tie and Black-Tie Optional

These “modern” versions of Black-Tie allow more wiggle room on the code. It’s still signalling that your occasion is formal but invites your guests to either avoid the expense of dinner suit hire or to express themselves a little more. The truth is, it often leads to more anxiety than relief for your guests. They might be left wondering “So do you want me to wear a tux or not?” or “How creative are you suggesting?”.

For men, this means you may choose to wear a tuxedo or to riff on the code a little. This might involve a velvet dinner jacket, maybe even in a deep burgundy or green, or a black dinner jacket, but with notch lapels or worn with a black satin necktie rather than a bow tie. If you want to stay with the bow tie, you could mix it up with a bowtie and cummerbund in a brighter, but matching colour. You could even wear a dark suit, dress shirt and a conservative dark tie.

Actually, the real problem with these dress codes is that there are as many interpretations of them as there are weddings, so you’ll get a very wide variety of outfits at your wedding, but they should all be formal-ish.

Semi Formal

This term is sometimes applied to Black-Tie Optional and sometimes applied to Business Attire and sometimes even to Cocktail. Really, it’s a cross-over code, so for the purposes of this blog, I’m going to skip straight past it, on the basis I’ve already covered the Black-Tie variations, and we’re talking about your wedding, not a business meeting. It’s actually not so helpful as a dress code for your guests.

Lounge Suit

You might want to think of this as being more formal than you wear to the office (if you’re not a lawyer and you even go into an office these days), but less formal than Black-Tie. It’s a good all-day-long code, compared to the evening-only Black-Tie.

Men should be in a 2 or 3 piece suit. Keep colours darker in the evening but consider lighter tones for daytime weddings.

Shirts should be dress shirts and ties are expected. Barrel cuffs or French cuffs are your choice. Shoes should be leather dress shoes. You can play a straight bat with a lace up derby or oxford or venture into a monk strap or brogue depending on the setting for your wedding. Shoe colours offer more choice, and you may consider chocolate, tan or even oxblood in addition to the black shoes expected in formal settings. Your shoe colour will determine your belt colour.

You are free to accessorise here, with bolder choices for your tie, and, if you’re wearing them, pocket square, lapel pin, tie bar or braces.

Note for Grooms: you may want to give your outfit more of a wedding feel with a “boutonniere” or small bouquet on your lapel. Boutonniere literally means “buttonhole” in French, which tells you the right place to wear it - the left lapel of your jacket, where the buttonhole is. This applies to all dress codes.

Cocktail

During the Prohibition era, couples began entertaining at home at “cocktail parties” rather than heading out to the clubs. This created an opportunity to relax the formal dress codes of evening wear while still making an effort to make it a night out. Men were still expected to wear a suit and typically wore a tie, but as the cocktail party hit its zenith in the 1950’s and 1960’s this changed a little. In 1948, Christian Dior was the first to label his shorter dress, with a tighter waist and fuller skirt the “cocktail dress”. Cocktail parties were typically held after working hours and this dress code is sometimes referred to as “After 5”.

Today men still have the option of wearing a suit and tie to a Cocktail dress coded wedding, but you can also wear a blazer or sports coat with coordinating trousers. The tie really is your choice and you can accessorise with greater freedom and individuality.

Trousers can still be tailored wool trousers, but well cut chinos will be acceptable, especially if the wedding is outdoors and during the day. Your choice of shoes might now include a more casual brogue or loafer.

 And the List Goes On

There are more dress codes out there, like Smart-Casual, Casual, and Coastal to name a few. As these are at the casual end of the spectrum, it probably matters less what your guests wear and most guests will be able to choose something from their existing repertoire of outfits. For that reason, I haven’t covered them in this post.

Whatever the vibe you want at your wedding, giving your guests a clue as to how you’d like their wardrobe choices to build on it is always helpful. Knowing what each code means is a good starting point to giving that guidance to your guests.